Lone Star

I'm walking under the Lone Star

Along the rocks and the shiny black water

At the end of a pier a woman is alone, hands folded, praying

I left her alone, I didn't feel comfortable staying

Inside of all of us, this pain, we pity ourselves

Boo fuckin' hoo

Well guess what, you fucking asshole?

It ain't all about you

There are people in this world who have dead children

They're deeply grieving

So quit your bitching, you poor little minor victim

That woman on the pier was suffering something heavy

Her eyes were drippin' with tears

I'm 49 years old and let me tell you something

I'm intuitive, my dear

I gave her space, and in my throat was a lump

And I watched her from a nearby secluded place for an hour and a half and made sure she didn't jump

Cars beating down the Carquinez Bridge

Shit coming out the smokestack

Trains coming down the train tracks

Starbucks on my walk back

Cars beating down the Carquinez Bridge

Shit coming out the smokestack

Trains coming down the train tracks

Starbucks on my walk back

Planted some cacti by the picnic table

Where the little grey cat is cutely cradled

And the orange California poppy

Sniffing the euphoric scent of the Eucalyptics tree

Walked past the 7-11 I went to the taco truck

Sunny California day, no rain in April, good luck

Pet my two favorite cats, they're so cute in their usual tucked away spaces

They're so cute, I want to eat their faces

This part of the song sounds like a beautiful Cameron Crowe film score

Jimmy Page-influenced, or a Nancy Wilson

All three artists whom I deeply adore

One December under the Christmas tree

Heart's Dream Boat Annie and Led Zeppelin III

That's the way it ought to be

That's the way it ought to be

I was banned by a church leader from playing a city in the state of Texas

Said he heard from this dude that they read that I was sexist

I said guess what, San Antonio, Texas?

I still love you, you Jack Johnson-born and bred state of the country, very best barbecue

Gonna ban me from San Antonio? No you don't

I'm gonna be back and play a show and get me some tacos

At Rosario's

And North Carolina, let me tell you something

I reiterate, you take the cake

For the most beautiful of all hillbilly states

But you won't let a transgender use a bathroom of their choice?

What kind of bullshit is that, you good old hillbilly boys

Gonna play a show in Chapel Hill next year, you'll see

And all transgenders are invited, I'm gonna let them get in for free

And they can use the men's bathroom in the venue if they used to be a girl

And they can use the women's bathroom in the venue if they used to be a boy

What the fuck is it to you

They're worthy of dignity and respect and use of any goddamn toilet

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Why are you fucking wearing that shit? (fuck!)

Got me some friends over there and they're good smart hillbillies

Billy and Chucky and Kimmy and Bobby and Becky

They don't support this transgender law

They'll be driving to my show in Chapel Hill from Asheville

I'm from Ohio and therefore I'm a hick

Call me one, and I won't be offended by it

Hicks and hillbillies, unite and get along

Rednecks, bury your axe with transgenders and be strong

Rednecks, bury the axe with transgenders and be strong

Rednecks, bury the axe with transgenders and sing along

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

Rednecks, lighten up and amend transgender law

When Donald Trump becomes president

Blame it on Facebook, Yelp and reality TV

And Twitter and Uber and Google and video games and every other thing that has turned this country

Into a bunch of dumbed-down slaves of technology

We wanted dumb headlines, well baby, we got it

We wanted instant gratification, right well baby, we got it

We wanted stupid entertainment, baby, we asked for it

This dumb motherfucker will be on the news every fucking day

And we willed it

He is a hundred percent full-on our creation

He is proof that we choose apps over education

He is proof of our mind-numbing Internet obsession

He's the result of our dumb-fuck-starin'-at-our-phones attention span limitations

People sittin' around hatin' on Donald Trump

We can't face it, but we asked for this junk

Not directly, but we fail to see

How our stupidity willed him into candidacy

Go ahead and take your smartphone out

Send a tweet to the world and pout pout pout

We planted the seed, and it's come to its fruition

Make no mistake, Donald Trump is our creation

Go ahead and have your 'Oh my fucking God' reaction

When he's elected, threaten to move to Vancouver, Canada, or Athens, Greece

As George Carlin said one night, "I believe you have to be asleep

To believe in the American Dream"

So all of us zone the fuck out a minute, get some popcorn, watch some Trump

Check your Facebook and keep up with the Kardashians