By Jeeves

BERTIE

It is patently clear

Any awkwardness here

Can be cleared up in less than a trice

Our identity switch

Who is who, which is which

We're in need of some solid advice

There's a painfully simple solution

It's as plain as the nose on your face

BINGO

By gad!

GUSSIE

By gosh!

BINGO

By heck!

GUSSIE

By gum!

BINGO

By rabbit's foot!

GUSSIE

By kingdom come!

BERTIE

By all my sainted aunt believes!

BINGO

By George!

GUSSIE

By Jove!

ALL

By Jeeves!

When we're faced with the grind

Of exerting the mind

We are filled with a deep sense of dread

BERTIE

"How on earth," I hear cries

"Does one give exercise

To a thing that's in bed in your head?"

BINGO

What we need is a free range consultant

GUSSIE

Where on earth do you find one of those?

BERTIE

By hook! By crook!

BINGO

By way! By pass!

GUSSIE

By sea! By air!

BERTIE

By road!

BINGO

By grass!

GUSSIE

By seven dwarves!

BERTIE

By forty thieves!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

BERTIE

By shuttlecock!

GUSSIE

By croquet hoop!

BINGO

By Panama!

BERTIE

By Windsor soup!

GUSSIE

By all those cards tucked up his sleeves!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

Our collective I.Q.

Of around 42

Cannot cope, to be perfectly frank

All true leaders of men

Delegate now and then

Try to keep their minds totally blank

To appreciate loftier matters

BINGO

Things that mostly go over my head

BERTIE

By derby day!

GUSSIE

By nursery tea!

BINGO

By moose!

BERTIE

By spoons!

GUSSIE

By half past three!

BINGO

By every tender breast that heaves!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

BERTIE

By marmalade!

GUSSIE

By bowler hat!

BINGO

By toothpaste tube!

BERTIE

By Burmese cat!

GUSSIE

By baby newts!

BINGO

By autumn leaves!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

Behold how Jeeves with sleight of hand

Conceives a scheme so carefully planned

Even we can understand

If he takes it terribly slow - ly

BERTIE

By Basingstoke!

BINGO

By cardboard box!

GUSSIE

By Budge's knees!

BERTIE

By Bassett's socks!

BINGO

By each that conjuror deceives!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

BERTIE

By jumping jack!

GUSSIE

By easy chair!

BINGO

By Bain Marie!

BERTIE

By Camembert!

GUSSIE

By every fruit bat in the eaves!

ALL

By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

BINGO

By walking boot!

GUSSIE

By thermal drawers!

BERTIE

By canapes!

BINGO

By Santa Claus!

GUSSIE

By all his mighty brain achieves!

BERTIE

By every spell the master weaves!

ALL

By heck! By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!

By Jeeves! By Jeeves! By Jeeves!

By Jeeves!